With Prague in our rearview mirror, we had our sights set on Krakow. We knew it would be a long car ride with kiddos (5-6 hours), so we planned a little castle hopping mid-trip to break up the drive.
Castle Bouzov, Czech Republic
The castle was beautiful, but unfortunately we arrived 15 minutes after the last tour of the day. That is, after enjoying our leisure lunch at the castle grounds restaurant. Oh well. So, after tooling around the courtyard and taking pictures as much as we could, we packed ourselves back in the car for the next 3 (or 6) hours of our trip. That's when the real fun began.
But first, castle pics:
I have to put this disclaimer out there: My coat is hideous. It's a ski coat. And not a very fashionable one. When we sorted our things and prepped for the move to Tel Aviv last summer, I somehow had it in my head that we were moving to the beach where it was always 80 degrees or more, and I would never need a coat. So, I took an old rain coat and this ski jacket.... you know for all the skiing we'll be doing. I dunno. I was hoping to find some more attractive options while on the trip, but all the stores were stocked with spring samples and no more winter coats. You'll have to just bear with the blue
Once back on the road to Krakow, things took a different turn for the worse. Stewart insisted on listening to painful, weird jazz while Katie and I wanted upbeat chic music. As we're arguing over our musical preferences, we notice blue lights behind us. So, we did the 'must be after someone else, let's change lanes maneuver.' It was us. We pulled over in the rain, and two Czech police officers approached our car. Stewart handed them our passports, rental car information, his driver's license and military ID. They handed back the passports and rental car info without a second glance, and then asked Stewart to step out of the car and speak with them behind the vehicle. At this point, Lydia blurts out, "Are they taking daddy to jail?!" I assured her they weren't, and we all said a prayer that this would only be a minor setback in our journey.
Meanwhile, behind the car, the officers told Stewart that he had been doing double the speed limit (not sure this was true) & if he didn't pay them 20,000 crowns (a little over $1000), they would take his license and impound the car. Stewart said he was mentally scrambling for some sort of plan or tactic; some way to get out of this one. Since nothing came to mind, he decided to just stick with the truth. He told them he didn't have any cash, but if they wrote him a ticket and took him somewhere he could withdraw cash or pay by credit, he would be happy to oblige. The cops immediately dropped their rate to 1000 crowns and told Stewart that they will accept Euro as well. Stewart again explained to them that he literally didn't have any cash on him - not crowns, not euros, not dollars, not shekels. NADA. This banter went back in forth a few more times, and the fact that he knew zero Czech and they knew almost zero English definitely worked to our advantage . Finally, Stewart said, "look, I don't have the money, and unless you're going to write me a ticket and take me somewhere that I could pay you, you're just going to have to take my license and impound the car...but first you need to give me back my military ID." Then the officers looked at him, looked at his ID, looked at each other, and calmly said, "You military?"
"Yes"
"US Army?"
"US Air Force."
"We will pretend we didn't see anything. Have a nice day."
"Thank you. I'll drive slower."
And that was that. Not too shabby...
Or so we thought. It wasn't too much after surviving our Czech police shakedown that the major highway on which we were driving ended. Literally just ended. No warning signs. No detour signs. Just an eight lane highway barricaded at night in the rain. Thankfully, we were able to exit the highway, but due to major GPS complications, non-English speaking gas station workers, and lack of a paper map - we remained lost for the next three hours...in the dark...in the rain. How's that for slowing down? Good times.
Shalom Y'all!












